The geezers at ‘Hamans Chop Shop’ over in Japan are responsible for building this super fine machine and the only thing wrong with it is…its not mine.

Matt Quinn’s wicked Flat-Track Triumph is the epitome of a 2-wheeled kamikaze machine. Lots of power. No brakes. Built to ride full speed on its side. Sounds a bit like a girl I used to knock about with!…erm…well the ‘lots of power’ part does anyway, because she was a midget Wrastler!

If I had to describe this wild Nova in an Irish accent, it would be;
“Bee Jasus bleedin chroist! Dis street machine is a total survoiver from de late '70s!
Oi really love de stickin' oyt tires'?!”.
Joey Danrea is your new hero. When you are the best, you don’t even have to try...

The fourth ‘Jokers’ article is about Gus and his wild Panhead Chopper.
If we had to rate this bike on a saltiness chart, it would be saltier than one of those super salty Dragster 3000 liquorices! Fuck!?!
Pics by: Christer Ehrling

Going fast is not the be all and end all of being cool is it? I mean you must need to have a certain amount of style thrown in there too right? My mate Mickey used to go on about how cool his car was because it was sooo fast. I would always reply, “So is a Hillman Imp with a Hemi in it, but I wouldn’t want one!” Jonnies green gets it all spot on with his Triton.

Have you seen the TV show 'Super Market Sweep' recently? Dale Winton’s face is off the charts in the colour department! He must look in the mirror every day and say to himself. “At least I don’t even look like an orange faced twat today.” Why do people wear fake tan when it doesn’t make you look tanned, it just makes you look like you’ve just been tango’ed! Lets get serious Winty no amount of spray on orange shit is going to hide those horrible bags you have under your eyes…Oooh you bitch.
Pics by: The Harpoon

…‘Blood stains, speed kills, fast cars, cheap thrills, rich girls, fine wine
I’ve lost my sense, I’ve lost control, I’ve lost my mind.’
Agent Orange, ‘Speed Kills.’

I met this old geezer once from Clapham who had a shit load of old British bikes just lying around in his shed and garden just rotting away. For some reason he wouldn't get rid of any of them because, “One day son I’m going to restore all of them.” Bollocks you old gimmer, you are like 93 and you would have to live to about 318 to get to all of them! Just let me have one! No? Then I hope you die really soon. Oh and ps, when I said I was a restorer…I lied!
Pics by: Paula Delley

I recently wrote about my friend Jerry who knew a guy called ‘Head In Bin’. Well I had the facts a little bit muddled up and I’m sad to say I misinformed you on a couple of details, so I will set the record straight once and for all! Jerry knew a guy who can’t be named for legal reasons, so we will call him ‘Captain Dickweed’. Now ‘Captain Dickweed was REALLY boring. He would corner you at any given time and talk to you about himself and his cars for hours on end. If you even tried to mutter something back he would stare at you blankly for a couple of seconds and then ramble on about himself again. Well it was at one car show that Jerry saw ‘Captain Dickweed’ heading his way and rather than sit though the hours of bilge that were to come, he launched himself head first into a nearby trash can full of rubbish, leaving just his legs sticking out. He stayed there until the coast was clear which was about 9 minutes. So, after that, every time Jerry saw him coming he would say, “shit we have to go ‘Head in Bin’ is walking towards us.” Phew! I’m glad that’s all cleared up.

The Style bible in this issue teaches you all about...Digit Diapers!

Who in their right mind does not love the look of a Knucklehead Harley? No one right? Wrong! I met this bloke once at Bromley Pageant who said Harleys didn’t have shit on his Austin Princess. When I said, “What the hell are you talking about”, he just pointed to the original 1972 Tax disk in the window and didn’t say a word. Nuff said flat cap bloke, you win.
Pics by: Pete (chopsnbobbers.com)

Chris rides this bobbed Panhead around the windy country roads of a Keighly, West Yorkshire and he slowed down just enough for Louise Limb to get these great pics!

Most people blow it when they meet a good looking bird and try and impress her with macho talk and muscle flexing. Forget it mate. Pretend you are a bitchy gay and tell her you love what she has done with her hair and…Bam! You’re in like Flynn!
Pics by: Mitzi

Our mate Christian got in the back of a pick up truck with his camera, then got driven by a madman at excessive speeds on various freeways in 100 degree heat and it was well worth it! He snapped some of the best riding images that we have seen in a long time! We salute you!
Pics by: Coalition Imagery

Trevelen of SuperCo. Customs and Scott Craig raise the stakes big time with this mind blowing Pan/Shovel that used to belong to Scott’s dad. Brought back to life in all its molded, candied, raked and extended glory. Sweet.

I now have a penguin called Elvis that was adopted for me as a birthday present. Hooray!
Pics by: Timo Kankare

Dr. Glory recently had the snip because he didn’t want to have any more babies. The thing he complained about the most was not having his genitalia messed with, but the fact that he had to wear little black Speedos for a week after the op. This is coming from a man who talks about men in Speedos all day long! Woopar!